lost

I am lost at home
and need to run away
I have nothing to say
to anyone here today
I have lost my voice
and my way in my world

I have stumbled before
scrapped my knees and hands
but I fell and skinned my mind
and bleed tears

© 5 July 2010
Cynthia Ryder

Silence

Commanded to be without words
you growl and moan earthy sounds
stemming from somewhere deep inside
hidden in daily domesticity
until surrender to your wild side
brings them out in you
and you crawl and claw
your way to the jungle
your catlike litheness
accompanies the silent human form
and you shape-shift to your feline self
when complete you purr in my arms
having given in to the command
the pain, pleasure and silence

© 28 April 2010
Cynthia Ryder

Gift

What you have given to me
is a boundless love to be free
Through your desire and need to serve
If you had asked last if I had the nerve
to accept you just a year ago
I know I would have said no

Fluid time and motion
changed my mind
and changed my world

What was so small is now grown
taken on a life of your own
I am moving and I dance with you
Any chance with you I have said yes to
with music and words you move into me
as part of your efforts to please me

© 20 April 2010
Cynthia Ryder

Found lines

golden glowing snaking
through my body heated
rising doing nothing
but read your words again
shivering delighting
in a spasm rocking
virtual joy grips me


© 14 January 2010
Cynthia Ryder

Dream

The Northern Lights danced with images of angels
as quickly as they formed and undulated in the sky
they fell away to sunshine and absolute rainbows
while the spirits around us moved in fluid form
drawing us together in soft embraces of love
we flow into the vibrant colours of our hearts
kissing sweetly the life that breaths through us
we are held in kind arms that sway with hope
and keep us from falling too quickly to cool earth
where we come to meet a cradle of gentle ground

© 14 February 2010
Cynthia Ryder

Need

I curse myself for this now
I fear what I know in myself
and I loathe that fey voice
in my mind that screams
I need you
even when I need so little
This is so deep it sickens
it is as old as breath
and lingers on in time
revisiting the defiant self
again in this lifetime
it pains till there are tears
drains the voice through sobs
now I am as much yours
as you have become mine
I fear the depths of this
as much as the heights
but I need you
more than I fear need
I can no longer doubt
that it's you I need

© 8 February 2010
Cynthia Ryder

Gravity

I want to wake up holding you
in more than just my mind
to feel you in real space
in a place more then just my heart
I need to breathe with you
more than just in spirit form
I crave it all in real time
to answer my questions of why
I am drawn to you into you
as the moon body to mother earth
your touch is tattooed on my skin
you voice is signing in my ears
I am pulled to you so hard
my will to resist is crushed
I am fully consumed in passion
by my desire to embrace you
entirely for a moment
forever eternally
but internally I am struck
by the impossibility of wishing
that it were possible once
to be swallowed wholly
and be taken in by you
by the gravity
of the time
of my mind

© 31 January 2010
Cynthia Ryder

creating us

I feel you
you are deftly
touching inside my skin
deeper than anyone else
has ever been
you are touching my mind
when you touch my body
and follow the lines
of the energy
that snakes through flesh
we follow the feeling
by smoothing muscle
and soothing memory
creating what was anew
creating from eons past
creating us from dust
when we breath it in
together

© 8 January 2010
Cynthia Ryder

old photographs

I am hearing stories
being softly spoken
in photographic sequence
showing off the wounds
freshly on your face
mirrored in your eyes
there is a depth of pain
in old photographs
where a new one is still
still shows the shadows
of your doubts and needs
overlooking the healing
I am the voyeur
seeing what you want
I toy with withholding
but the voices are loud
telling me to touch you
to give in and let you give
through this you will live

© 3 January 2010
Cynthia Ryder

Collared

I see you on your knees
head bowed before me
waiting
I order you
Lift your hair
rising from my chair
bringing the collar
down to your lips to kiss
this symbol of acceptance
of your bliss
knowing
you have chosen freely
to enter into slavery
slipping
the black collar around
circling your neck
you are now bound
snapping
the lock in its place
you are mine
for however long
we have this time

© 18 December 2009
Cynthia Ryder
--

Cherries

tongue flicks, open lips
feed me the cherry
from your finger tips
rich red and sweet
juicy it drips
when I bite the skin
giving way
to sensual pleasure
tasting
scenting
feeling
I imagine crushing
the fruit on your chest
and watching
blood red streaks forming
descending streams
of deliciousness
drops to be licked
sucked from your nipples
skin tinted red
by the flesh of the fruit
I take in my mouth
feed me another

© 15 December 2009
Cynthia Ryder
--

Breathe

breathing life through
and into each other
undulating
under your hands
uncoiling, rising,
It directs me
forcing my tongue
into your mouth
biting at your lips
I pull you in
pull in your energy
your love heats me
burns my spirit
searing the memory
of desire on my heart,
where today is so open
my hands fell into my body
sinking below my breasts
past my ribs to rest
inside my beating heart.

© 30 November 2009
Cynthia Ryder
--

Golden

golden glowing snaking
it is rushing my body
I am heated
it is rising
I am nothing
doing nothing
but reading your words
shivering
delighting
spasm of virtual joy
I am reduced
to a single moment
strengthened
in your mind
I am beyond words
I am voiceless
silenced
timeless
glowing golden
lit by your soul

© 27 November 2009
Cynthia Ryder
--

blue

my lover friend
I hold your head to my breast
caress the curls
pull your hair from your face
force me to gaze
into your blue eyes and see
myself swallowed
deeper than if I were diving
from lava formed
green cliffs above a loving sea

© 23 November 2009
Cynthia Ryder
--

Stream

I am conscious of the act
of erotic submission
soul gazing searching
a finger on the lips
slowly being tasted
sucked and slid
inside the mouth
sweet wetness
as conscious this morning
of the need to drum
outside in the crisp cool
with woodsmoke
hanging low over the house
scents of cedar and maple
conscious of clustering finches
migrating and singing
unaffected by my movement
by the drum beats
the heart beats
I seek the next sound
the next moment
I am conscious

© 5 November 2009
Cynthia Ryder

Shadows

I have walked in the shadow
of the living
for at least a decade here
lingering
at coffee shops and malls
and watching
the lives around me swarm
and wishing
to live a life like theirs
souls parading
with vibrancy and vigor
their passing
by my solitary seat in dim light

I was dragged from the shadows
by ghosts from my past lives
they reminded me that I breath
and thrive in light and love
and that I live and dance still

© 28 October 2009
Cynthia Ryder
--

Witch Hazel

A minuet in miniature of yellow
blooms form after the cruel frosts
destroy all other blossoms in the garden
that colours the leaves of other trees
dropping them in cluttered chaos
but leaving the precious flowers
of the witch hazel to linger on
into the winter of November
as we bundle in fleece and down-fill
I am the hazel blossom
coming late to beauty
when others have faded from age
and fallen to the hoar frosts
that pull the life from us

© 29 October 2009
Cynthia Ryder
--

49:54

for 49 minutes and 54 seconds
you talked about you
you are a child in your way
too old and too educated for the title
as a man of substance and power
but a boy-child at heart
I hope you grow into yourself
since selfish children annoy

© 22 September 2009
Cynthia Ryder
--

Frosted

fall frosted leaves
red golden glowing
through window panes
whispering with ice
fronds and feathers
in polite crystal forms
tracing the season end
of summer heat
announcing
the impending arrival
of another visitor
who often overstays
his wintry welcome

© 17 September 2009
Cynthia Ryder
--

dis-ease

last night i needed you
but you were silent beyond words
the illness that you carry
creates confusion from nothing
the covering that you use
to conceal the pain is fixed
near permanently to your face
i can not penetrate it
it holds me out and back
as you hold back your love
refusing warm comfort
i withdraw protecting myself
from your quiet dis-ease

© 15 September 2009
Cynthia Ryder
--